


Shitbird

by HashtagLEH



Series: Something Like a Family [7]
Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Angst and Feels, Billy Hargrove & Maxine "Max" Mayfield Bonding, Billy Hargrove Has Feelings, Billy Hargrove Is Bad at Feelings, Billy Hargrove Tries to Be a Better Person, Canonical Child Abuse, Don't worry, Family Fluff, Forgiveness, Gay Billy Hargrove, Gen, Good Sibling Billy Hargrove, Good Sibling Maxine "Max" Mayfield, Happy Ending, However:, Hurt Billy Hargrove, It's About Time, Pre-Canon, Protective Billy Hargrove, Protective Maxine "Max" Mayfield, Soft Billy Hargrove, Stranger Things 2, but not the end of the series, finally getting the relationship they deserve, for the first bit anyway, he tries though, really just the family that is Billy and Max but y'know
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-05
Updated: 2020-12-05
Packaged: 2021-03-09 21:33:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,616
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27873085
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HashtagLEH/pseuds/HashtagLEH
Summary: “Billy,” she blurted in a gasp, and then stopped, unable to say anything else and uncertain what she would say if she could.Billy didn’t react how she had expected; he glanced over at her with a confused look, and then used his thumb to prod at the edges of the bruise, as though he’d forgotten about it already. Max didn’t know how he could have forgotten it – it must hurt.“It was a demodog,” he said, looking over at her with a gaze full of meaning, like they were coming up with one of his stories and she was supposed to play along and like she was supposed to immediately understand.But shedidn’tunderstand.
Relationships: Billy Hargrove & Maxine "Max" Mayfield
Series: Something Like a Family [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2009263
Comments: 16
Kudos: 175





	Shitbird

**Author's Note:**

> The setup for this came about because I always thought that the insult "shitbird" was pretty odd and I was like _there's GOT to be a story there..._ and it turned into this. I asked my parents if shitbird had been some time-specific insult, and they'd never heard of it, but also that doesn't mean much because Robin also calls Steve "dingus" and that wasn't an insult then either, so clearly the writers aren't interested in period accuracy beyond the surface.
> 
> Has anyone else heard the insult "shitbird" before the show? Drop me a line if you have, because I'm curious and it's strange.
> 
> Anyway, hope you like the fic. It gets soft. :)

When Neil and Susan first got married, Billy and Max had been left to their own devices most afternoons. It had taken some time to get used to each other, to get used to the fact that they now lived with a sibling where before each of them had been only children. Max had been excited to have an older brother, but she also worried that he might not like her, that he might think she was weird for not liking dresses and make-up and all things pink like all the other girls her age. She had worried so much about it that it took several months for her to come out of her shell around him, to stop pretending to be excited and pleased when he gave her glittery pencils he’d found at school or when Neil bought her ice cream from the truck that was pink and shaped into a princess crown.

(Looking back, she was pretty sure that he’d figured it out before she brought it up with him, because she’d been eight and not exactly an expert at what to do to hide her personality, so she hadn’t even thought to wear anything other than her usual tee shirts and jeans and sneakers, or to ask her mom to teach her how to do her hair pretty or something. She’d hardly noticed when he started bringing her erasers in the shape of cars or some cool laces he’d found for her shoes, but it hadn’t taken long after knowing each other for him to do so.)

She had been nervous and shy, in those first few months where Billy was her only company after school. But he’d taken her to the beach one day, and they’d walked along the boardwalk while she’d ranted about her math teacher taking away points because she was too loud, and it hadn’t had anything to do with math so why should her grade suffer for it? The day had been otherwise ordinary – they lived close enough to the beach that they walked there a lot when they could, when Neil and Susan would be gone for hours and they didn’t want to spend that time cooped up in their apartment.

On this particular day, as they’d been walking on the boardwalk, a couple of guys had almost run into them as they zipped by on their skateboards, and Billy had shouted curses back to them as they jumped out of the way, but Max had focused more on the way one of the boys jumped and flipped the board as he went, landing on it smoothly as it continued to zoom down the wooden slats. He’d clearly been showing off, but Max was amazed by it anyway, and couldn’t help the longing look toward the skateboards, because she wanted to learn how to do that too but that wasn’t for girls and she was really trying to be more like what she was expected to be.

She hadn’t thought Billy had noticed at first, as they kept walking and resumed their talk of stupid teachers, but he’d unexpectedly veered into a gift shop full of overpriced shit. Minutes later as they were walking out Billy dangled a key chain in front of Max, saying gruffly, like it didn’t really matter, “Thought you might like it.”

The keychain was cheap, a souvenir made in China by the hundreds, but for Max it represented a lot more, because it was a _skateboard_. It was made of lightweight plastic and the palm trees on it only sort of looked like the ones on the beach, and it said _California_ across the front of it in blocky lettering. Max had accepted it, amazed that Billy had not only thought to get this gift for her, but that he’d noticed how she wanted to skateboard herself and this was practically tacit approval that she was just fine in his eyes for having such a desire.

She had grinned at him, thanking him and tightening her grip around the keychain, not wanting to attach it to her backpack just yet, and he’d just rolled his eyes and kept walking, looking embarrassed at the thanks.

She couldn’t remember what it was exactly that she’d said to him then – something cheeky and sarcastic and teasing. He’d looked over at her and, trying to hide a smile, and said, “You’re such a – shit!” His eyes went wide and shocked, looking at her shoulder, and for a moment she’d thought he was calling her a shit, which wasn’t totally out of character for the thirteen year old, but then he’d blurted like he was clarifying, “Bird!” and pointed up and behind her, into the sky.

And she understood then when the smell entered her nostrils, and she’d looked down to see bird poop dripping down her hair – the thickness of her hair meant she hadn’t felt it when it landed.

As disgusted as she was with it, she was also too happy with Billy’s acceptance for _her_ and what she liked, and the look on Billy’s face then was funny as he seemed to be waiting for a tantrum or exclamation of disgust, and so she’d just started giggling and laughing hysterically, not bothering with the poop still dripping down her front.

“I’m a ‘shitbird’?” she’d teased, his expression vaguely concerned like he thought she’d cracked, and it just made her laugh harder. “That’s not even a real insult – where did you hear _that_?”

Billy’s face had gone amusedly disgruntled, and he’d shoved her gently in the side. “It works for you, at least,” he’d grumbled. A pause, and then with emphasis, “Shitbird.”

Max had kept laughing, and somehow, the nickname had stuck. As they’d gotten older, even when he had gotten mad at her for some reason or another, she had always known that they were okay when he called her “shitbird”. It was their little inside joke that, even if he hadn’t forgiven her for something yet when he said it, she knew that it was like his little way of saying that they _would_ be okay. She knew that he was only truly upset when he called her other things, other insults meant to hurt.

After the disaster that had led to their moving out of California, she was certain that that had been lost between them. At first, he had been coldly silent toward her any time she tried to check on him, but then Neil had said that in their drive across country, Max would ride with Billy, and the hateful words had begun.

Max had waited, in that drive. It had taken them days to get to Indiana, days in which Billy let out all manner of vitriol, and at any moment she expected him to say “shitbird” at the end of it, to somehow let her know that this hatred wouldn’t be forever.

But it hadn’t come. It hadn’t come, and Max stopped pushing, stopped trying to apologize, because she was certain that she had destroyed every bit of the good relationship they’d had up to that point, all because she had made an offhanded comment to tease Billy about Harry when she hadn’t realized that Neil was home early from work and heard her say it. She had wanted to cry, but she didn’t want Billy to use that as some excuse for why she was more girly, that she was clearly too girly to ride a skateboard and she should just go put on a skirt. He hadn’t brought it up amidst the rest of his angered words, but at that point she hadn’t been sure what he would throw back in her face because she wasn’t sure where they stood anymore.

And she didn’t know why Billy was so angry with her, because it had been an accident and she had promised to be more careful in the future, and he could heal from all the injuries Neil had inflicted so why was it taking so long for things to go back to normal between them? It wasn’t her fault that Neil was terrible, and he _had_ to know that she would protect him more carefully now, but he still kept her as much at a distance as before. It made her so _angry_ – angry at Billy for being stupid but even more angry at Neil for doing this. She blamed him for their destroyed relationship but she couldn’t really do anything about it because then Neil might blackmail either one of them with the truth that Billy was gay. She couldn’t trust that the police would help, or that they wouldn’t just let Neil do what he could because they approved of his attempts to “straighten him out” (literally), and so she had to keep her mouth shut and just hope that eventually Billy forgave her.

That hope had slowly faded along with Billy’s bruises, and she’d felt so _lonely_ and not sure what to do. She had hoped that she could find friendship in the boys, that she could fill the hole that Billy had carved in her heart, but it wasn’t the same and they excluded her soon enough anyway. They were keeping secrets which was _bullshit_ and then Lucas was lying to her and she could see that it was just a way of excluding her, of making sure the _girl_ was kept from their stupid little group, and she’d felt more alone than ever. That Billy had then tried shoving racist bullshit down her throat when he’d asked about it just stung more, and she felt like she really didn’t know him at all anymore, and she felt more alone than ever.

But that night, when he’d gone tearing out of the house, using her as an excuse, she’d felt her heart lift a little when he’d said “shitbird”, like he wasn’t even thinking about it, like he wasn’t holding onto his anger at her anymore. She’d thought things might be okay, eventually.

But then she’d had to go and ruin it, teasing too soon and too harsh, and he’d gotten angry so she’d gotten angry because this was all such _bullshit_ , and he’d left her to be alone at the arcade to do God knew what for a couple of hours. When he’d returned to pick her up he’d been quiet, and then he was disappearing the next day too, and she was curious what he was doing so early on a Saturday morning, but she hadn’t wanted to upset him any more than he already was and left him to it.

She’d arrived back home after Lucas had shared some bullshit story about a parallel world and government conspiracies, just in time to hear the phone ring, and when she’d answered the first thing she’d processed was that it was Billy. The second thing she processed was that with the very first words out of his mouth, he’d called her “shitbird”. She felt hope again, and tried squashing it down, remembering what had happened last time, but she failed at that when he called her by that nickname again, within minutes of the first time. She didn’t know if he realized he’d even done it, but it was enough that he had.

She’d stopped thinking so much about Billy when it turned out that what Lucas had told her about this “Upside Down” and about monsters was true, and she found herself fighting alongside them and some high school dude name Steve. Then everyone involved had gone to the Byers house and she had seen everyone there that Lucas had said, even the chief of police, and it seemed too amazing but she was running on adrenaline with these things because _monsters were real_ and one was _actually_ inside Will –

And then the girl she learned was El came through the door, looking like some kind of punk and not at all like she’d expected or the boys had described, and _Billy_ of all people had followed right behind her, and things began to click into place.

But then when she’d introduced herself to El, thinking that she would be a new friend because she had been friends with the boys and she had somehow made friends with Billy, El had completely rejected her hand, with a pointed air of dislike. Max had been hurt, and confused, and she’d looked at Billy but Billy wasn’t looking her way and was _he_ the reason El didn’t like her? Had he turned her against Max before they’d even met?

And Max hadn’t wanted to believe it, because Billy had called her “shitbird” three times in the past two days, and that _had_ to mean something, didn’t it?

But then she’d watched him watch El as they talked about their plans, with something in his eyes that she used to see directed toward her, and she felt a frisson of pain, because clearly Billy had found a new sister. El was Max’s replacement – Billy didn’t need or want her anymore. And why should he? El was obviously better in every way – clearly the boys agreed, or they would’ve told her about her sooner. El had powers, and she was pretty and more girly and what wasn’t to like?

She agreed with the boys that they should do all they could to help El and Hopper with the demodogs, but in the back of her mind she also hoped that protecting the one that everyone else cared about so much would maybe mean she could stay, that she could still be considered a part of the group. She didn’t want to be alone.

She was beginning to feel a little more included in the group when it was all over, when they piled together on the couch and she noticed that Lucas was holding her hand just as tightly as he was holding Will’s. Even Mike wasn’t looking at her resentfully when they made eye contact – everyone was just relieved that they were all safe.

When Hopper brought up parents, Max looked at Billy, because he was good at coming up with reasons or excuses and she was used enough to following his lead on their stories for why they were late coming back or something. But when he was reminded of their parents, rather than the expected tiredness and maybe annoyance as he thought to come up with a story, his face went white and he was abruptly antsy again, and Max knew him enough to realize that he looked – _scared_ , almost. Grim, maybe. Panicked, and trying very hard not to show it.

But Billy was clearly exhausted, and Max realized suddenly that he was normally very good at keeping masks on and walls up, if he was failing so spectacularly at it now. And she thought that Neil would be annoyed, that they hadn’t been there when he and Susan returned from their trip, but Billy’s panicked reaction and insistent need to get out and get back suggested something entirely worse.

She wasn’t used to seeing Billy looking like this – he was unstoppable, unbreakable, and confident. A little bit of an asshole, most of the time. But the expression still seemed familiar, and she remembered abruptly that the last time she had seen it had been when Neil had stormed into the room to see Billy and Harry together. It had been fear, and panic, and resignation and a little stubbornness.

Max didn’t know why Billy would be so afraid to return late – this had nothing to do with him being gay. Maybe he was just not thinking clearly, exhausted as he was and maybe in shock from the events of the night, and wires were being crossed in his head to tell him that they needed to hurry up and go.

In any case, Max just followed him quietly out the door and into his car, noticing that his hands were shaking as he shoved the keys into the ignition but not saying anything about it.

“I’m sure it’ll be fine,” she tried telling him, because she didn’t like Billy looking like this and she couldn’t just do _nothing_.

“Yes,” Billy said, glancing at her briefly before looking in the rearview mirror as he backed out. His voice was more solid than his expression, some kind of determination there as he spoke, like he’d come to some decision. “It will be.”

“We’re just late,” Max tried again as they turned onto the paved road. “We can say the car broke down, or something.”

Billy’s gaze cut over to her. “You really think that’ll matter?” he said incredulously. “I’m fucked, and we both know it. Keep your mouth shut and let me deal with it.”

The certainty in his voice unsettled something in Max, made her worry that something else was going on that she didn’t know all the details of. She recalled the last few days they’d spent in California, the way everyone in the house had seemed to walk on eggshells around each other, Neil the only one who acted somewhat normal. Like there was nothing wrong with beating his son black and blue days before. She had felt wrong-footed then, but had supposed it was the new distance between her and Billy that was the cause of it.

“You know, you could just blame it on me,” Max suggested, looking over at him. “Just let Neil be mad at me instead.”

Billy’s expression went abruptly darker, hands tightening on the steering wheel and making the leather squeak. “Don’t be stupid,” he snapped.

Max had been about to go on, but at his words her mouth shut with a click, lips tightening. They both knew that some insults meant nothing – just words spoken in anger that didn’t even need to be forgiven. But sometimes the most simple were the most hurtful, and “stupid” was one of those ones that fell under that umbrella. It had been used too much by the bullies in school to be anything but a reminder of the pain she’d gone through for years because she was different. Billy had been the one she’d told about it, in favor of going to her mom about it, and he had never called her stupid since then. An idiot, a shithead, a bitch, an asshole – everything else was fair game that they each used easily. But he’d never called her stupid before, and she felt betrayed anew that he was doing so now. So she went silent, because whatever. Billy could deal with Neil all he wanted then – she was sure it wouldn’t be that bad anyway.

“We’ll still have to go to school,” Billy said tightly as he turned onto Old Cherry Road. “So if you’re not out and ready to go by seven I’m breaking down your door, shitbird.”

Although he used the nickname, the one she had grown to love, right then it felt more like a mockery than anything. Why couldn’t Billy just be _clear_? She was tired of the uncertainty of where they stood – she just wanted it to go back to how it had been before, but she thought she may as well give up on that by now. He was still angry, and he clearly preferred someone else as his sister now, someone who wouldn’t hurt him as Max had, and she was tired of being jerked around without knowing when it was going to happen or how to prepare.

They entered the house quietly, and Max glanced around, quietly vindicated when Neil clearly wasn’t lying in wait to lay into Billy or something – Billy was clearly worried over nothing. She went to her room without looking at Billy, closing her door quietly behind her. Glancing at the alarm clock on her nightstand, she discovered that she would have about an hour before she would need to get up to get ready for school. Deciding to take advantage of every moment of it, she fell into bed without bothering to take off her shoes. Exhaustion won out, and in moments she was asleep, not thinking about Billy at all.

***

She was running a little late for school, but not too much. She had forgotten to reset her alarm clock after the weekend of sleeping in, and it was a thud in the kitchen that had awakened her from nightmares of teeth and slimy tentacles a little after six-thirty. She had hurried through a shower, resigning herself to being cold all day, because she had to wash her hair because the gunk from the tunnels was still littered through it, but she didn’t have time to blow dry it _and_ grab her homework and assignments for school, so she just left it hanging down as usual, grabbing her backpack and a granola bar, bidding quick farewell to Neil who was drinking coffee at the counter before running out the door, where Billy was waiting in his car already.

She expected a rude remark, or at the very least something snarky, so she was surprised when he just silently shifted the car into gear and backed out of the driveway.

It was when he was turning to look over his shoulder out the back window that she glanced over at him uncertainly, and immediately forgot about her expectations when her eyes caught on the bruise blossoming on his cheekbone, curving around the outside of his eye socket. It was tinging with blue already, darker colors rising to the surface and the red hadn’t faded yet around the edges. It looked recent and _painful_.

“ _Billy_ ,” she blurted in a gasp, and then stopped, unable to say anything else and uncertain what she would say if she could.

Billy didn’t react how she had expected; he glanced over at her with a confused look, and then used his thumb to prod at the edges of the bruise, as though he’d forgotten about it already. Max didn’t know how he could have forgotten it – it must hurt.

“It was a demodog,” he said, looking over at her with a gaze full of meaning, like they were coming up with one of his _stories_ and she was supposed to play along and like she was supposed to immediately understand.

But she _didn’t_ understand, and she said, “But you didn’t have that two hours ago, what _happened_ …”

And then she snapped her mouth shut, because finally her mind caught up to her, and she remembered how tense Billy had been, how he had said that he would deal with Neil, how he hadn’t wanted her involved at all. How he had gotten angry when she had suggested they blame it on her instead, because she hadn’t thought it would be a big deal but she’d just wanted to get that _look_ off of Billy’s face…

She thought she might understand that look, now.

Billy was looking over at her with a flat glare now. “Don’t pretend this is news, Max,” he said, probably meaning to sound threatening, but it instead came out sounding tired.

“I thought…” Max stammered, mind whirling, “I thought it was just – a one-time thing. Because he found out. I didn’t know…”

Billy’s expression was doubtful, like he thought she was lying, and his gaze cut up and down her form, like he was looking for the truth in her posture. After a moment, he seemed to both slump and go tense at the same time.

“Neil has been an asshole since long before he knew Susan,” he said casually, like it was nothing to tell her that this – this _abuse_ had been going on for _years_ , and wasn’t just limited to beating out the gay, trying to reform him and punish him for who he liked.

 _I’m fucked and we both know it,_ she remembered him saying just a couple hours previous. She hadn’t understood then, and some part of her wished she didn’t understand now. But it’s not like the truth would disappear if she was ignorant to it. She remembered suddenly how she had awakened at the sound of a thud in the kitchen, and had thought something had dropped or a cabinet door had closed too loudly – but now she thought it might have been the last part of Neil dealing with Billy. She remembered Neil’s nonchalant air when she’d said goodbye, like nothing was amiss as he sipped from his cup of coffee, and she felt sick to her stomach.

“I _hate_ him,” she said suddenly, with a fierceness that seemed to surprise Billy, if his raised eyebrows at her were anything to go by. She felt like her heart was trying to squeeze out of her chest with the pain of that realization, that Billy was _surprised_ to have her on his side, like he’d expected her to make some excuse or side with Neil after all.

That surprise made her press on, made her insist in the hopes that he would believe her, “I _hate_ him, Billy – I swear I didn’t know and…” She paused as a flash of horror went through her as she remembered all the times in the past couple of weeks that Neil had told Billy to watch out for her, to keep her safe, to get her home from school with enough time for her to do her homework. All the times she had intentionally made it harder for him, because she had thought he was just being uptight and wanted to irritate him, because she hadn’t understood the repercussions he would receive later from Neil. She wondered how often he had taken the brunt of the punishment because she was being a little shit.

“I’m sorry,” she blurted, talking quickly to try and get everything out before he inevitably cut her off again in anger, not wanting to hear her apologies. It had happened too much in the past couple of weeks but now she just _needed_ him to know. “Not just for what happened in California, but for being a shithead and getting you in trouble with Neil all the time. I didn’t know about all of it, I _swear_. And I know you hate me now but I swear I didn’t know about Neil being there, I really didn’t mean to out you, I promise I don’t care about all of that and I won’t ever tell anyone else, I _promise_.”

She was near tears by the end of her tangent, and she wanted to ramble some more but she forced herself silent when she noticed Billy slowing the car down, before he pulled over to the side of the road, putting the car into park. She waited for him to rip into her, to tell her exactly where she could shove her false apologies and explanations, for him to tell her to get the hell out of his car and walk the rest of the way to the school because he couldn’t stand to be in her presence for a moment longer.

It was quiet for the briefest of moments, before Billy turned to her and said, “I don’t hate you, shitbird.”

Max might have thought he was lying, but the tone of his voice suggested otherwise, very unlike his usual self, and she looked up at him to see him watching her with a burning gaze, something like guilt in the lines of his face. And he’d still called her “shitbird”, and he didn’t seem angry – at _all_.

“I’ve treated you like shit the last couple of weeks – you didn’t deserve that,” Billy said haltingly, struggling with his words. Max could hear the apology in it, despite the lack of the specific phrasing. “I thought…”

“That I agreed with what Neil did?” Max finished, but it wasn’t really a question. “I didn’t. I _don’t_. I knew he was an asshole, but I didn’t know he was…this bad.”

At last, Billy seemed like he believed her, and she wanted to cry with the relief of it, but she forced herself to hold back.

“I’m sorry,” she said again, because apparently she couldn’t seem to stop now that she had been allowed to start.

“It’s fine,” Billy said, expression and voice both tired. Max vaguely wondered if he’d gotten _any_ sleep since they’d gotten back home, but that wasn’t really the focus right now so she didn’t ask.

But it did remind her of something else, and she couldn’t help saying, “Is El…” she stopped, started over with, “Everyone seemed to know El before I did. And you’re really protective of her.”

“Yeah, I met her last weekend,” Billy said, looking confused at the direction the conversation had taken. “Everything else kind of happened by accident, and she asked me to help her find her mom, and then she found out about a sister in Chicago so we went there to find her and got caught up in some bullshit…” he shook his head, like he was coming back to the present as he focused on her again. “What about her?”

“Just…” Max felt a little stupid, but she couldn’t help asking, “Do you wish she was your step sister instead of me?”

Billy stopped, stilling completely as he looked at her – a little incredulously, and a little sad but like he was trying to hide that part. “You’ve gotta be kidding me, shitbird,” he said, and this time the insult fell off his lips almost pointedly, like he was reminding her that he’d known her a lot longer or something. But she didn’t feel like that should mean anything – especially not after the last few weeks, when her world had been upended.

“It’s just that she’s a lot cooler, I know,” Max started rambling again, “And everyone _else_ seems to prefer her and yesterday everyone was just making sure she was alright, which, I _get_ it because she had to close the gate and everything and it was dangerous and they hadn’t seen her in forever, but also she already doesn’t like me and I don’t know _why_ and you spent so much time with her this weekend and you’ve known her for like, a _week_ and you’re really protective of her…”

“Max,” Billy cut her off, which she was glad for because she couldn’t seem to stop herself on her own and she didn’t really know what she was going to say before she said it so she was glad for the interruption and went silent.

He was quiet too though, for so long that Max wondered if he was going to say anything, and her heart pounded faster in something like disappointment and loneliness before he finally got out, “I…care about her. I think that’s obvious – to you, at least. But I’m not…picking between you two, or choosing a favorite, or whatever other bullshit you’re probably thinking.”

Max’s heart began to sink further in her chest, because she was pretty sure that that was supposed to be an unusually nice way of saying that he preferred El but maybe didn’t want to hurt her feelings. His words didn’t reassure her at all.

But then he glanced over at her, and his lips tightened at the look that must have been on her face before he looked skyward as though praying for help.

Billy turned back to her, brows furrowed and a serious expression on his face as he blew out a quick breath, like he was steeling himself. “Listen closely, shitbird, because I’m only gonna say this once,” he warned, pointing at her demonstratively. “You and I are connected forever. Even if Neil and Susan got divorced _tomorrow_ , you would still be my sister. No one else is going to change that. Got it?”

Max stared at Billy, eyes wide because Billy had never before been so _open_ about his feelings – it just wasn’t something the two of them did. But she supposed that was the point, because it did its job exactly of reassuring her and she wanted to cry a little bit from the relief of it but also she was so _happy_ that she just released the desire in the form of a growing, beaming smile at him.

Billy looked relieved that she’d understood, and then disgruntled at the unabashed joy on her face. He turned back to the wheel, and put the car back into drive, pulling out onto the road.

“Stop looking at me like that,” he muttered, glancing at her before looking back at the road ahead. His cheeks and the sides of his neck were a little red.

And she did stop looking at him, turning back to look at the road herself, but she made no attempt to squash the smile on her face because not only was there the joy of being called _sister_ , but there was the relief that things could finally go back to something like normalcy again. That hole that he’d carved in her heart filled, and even if the Party wasn’t interested in her anymore now that they had El back, she no longer felt nearly so lonely as she had before. With Billy being her friend – her _brother_ again, she thought she might be able to face anything else ahead of her.

They pulled into the school parking lot just in time to hear the late bell ring, and Max knew she was going to be late, but as she pulled her skateboard out after her she couldn’t bring herself to care.

“Don’t be late, shitbird!” he called after her out the open window as she dropped the skateboard to the ground.

Max waved behind her, shooting Billy a cheeky grin before shoving off toward the school. “I won’t!”

**Author's Note:**

> Y'all this was chicken soup for my soul. I loved writing them clearing things up, and having a relationship, and I'm so excited for them to have a good relationship going forward. This doesn't mean Billy's not going to be an asshole later on, because I love him being an asshole sometimes too, but he will definitely be softer because he's forgiven Max now.
> 
> I hadn't originally intended to write the forgiveness from Max's point of view, but that's how it went and I like it. I love Max so much. I had also intended to write some of Max's thoughts about Billy's crush on Steve (because I plan that she noticed their interactions the night before and was like "hmmm...") but it didn't end up flowing right so that will come up at some later point. Right now she's just too pleased to have Billy back to bother with teasing or even really thinking about anything else.
> 
> Also, this isn't the end of talking about the abuse by any means. But they had so much to talk about that many things just had to graze the surface for now to avoid it being too out of character or repetitive. 
> 
> Anyway, hope y'all liked it. :)


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